293 Parents: “how much is too much” when it comes to spring and summer plans for your young goalie?
The audio segment published here takes you directly to the Parent Segment from this episode.
- A young goalie's desire to participate in spring or summer programs is not, by itself, a sufficient reason to commit — parents must weigh additional factors before signing up.
- The parent-coach relationship mirrors the broader parent-child relationship: early on you are the most influential figure, but your role must evolve toward supporting independence as your goalie grows.
- Coaching your child's team — even as a volunteer with no prior playing experience — is a viable and rewarding path; Hockey Canada and USA Hockey offer goaltending coach certification courses accessible to parents.
- Deliberately stepping back and allowing a young goalie to work through challenges independently can develop greater self-reliance and long-term growth.
- Balancing the dual roles of parent and coach requires conscious restraint — prioritizing the parent-child relationship over short-term on-ice gains protects the bond that matters most.
In the Parent Segment, presented by Stop It Goaltending U the App, we talk about “how much is too much” when it comes to spring and summer plans for your young goalie, what factors should go into those decisions, and why “my goalie want to do it” isn’t always a good reason to let them.
Coaching Your Child: Some thoughts on your evolving relationship
I’ve spoken before about balancing the roles of both coach and parent, but as I saw the question come up again recently, it got the wheels turning.
We rarely take ourselves too seriously here but the thought popped into my head – Goaltending is a metaphor for life. More specifically, the way a coach-athlete relationship evolves mirrors the journey of a regular parent-child relationship.
If you’re considering coaching – even as a volunteer with a child new to the game, I encourage you to take that step. You don’t need to have played yourself. Just as we all began parenting without prior experience, you can begin coaching the same way. You learn, you adapt, and you grow alongside your child. In return, you gain an experience and a bond that you wouldn’t trade for anything.
There are fantastic resources available – I’ve now taken the first level of the Hockey Canada and US Hockey goaltending coach certification courses and in both cases there were plenty of parents there eager to learn and help – you can do it too.
We were all new parents once. We made mistakes, we learned, and we raised kids we are proud of. Coaching can be the same journey.
In the early years, as your child takes their first strides on the ice, you are the most influential person in their development as a goalie. But as they grow, just like in life, your role must evolve. Being a goalie parent and coach means finding the right balance—supporting their growth without overshadowing their independence.
Personally, I never wanted to jeopardize my relationship as a parent, so I know I pushed less than others might have. There were times when my son got frustrated that I wasn’t more hands-on, that I left him to work things out on his own. But looking back, I believe that made him a better goalie. He became independent. He valued coach feedback but also enjoyed working on his game alone. If I had been an overbearing taskmaster, controlling every aspect of his development, he wouldn’t be the self-sufficient, confident man he is today. So don’t stress about pushing too hard—your role as a goalie coach might last a few years, but your role as a parent lasts a lifetime.
Some of us have the experience to remain a coach for many years or continue by committing to learning and growing with their child. Many great coaches have climbed the ranks without an extensive goaltending background. You on the other hand might choose to only help out in those early formative years.
However long you work with them, every parent-coach faces a transition. Just as we prepare our children to go off to school and learn from experienced teachers, we also have to prepare them to learn from other coaches. That moment will come at different times for everyone—whether it’s after a few seasons for that volunteer parent at the U8 level or later as a teenager. For us, that transition came at U18, and while admittedly it was hard to make that change earlier than I would have hoped, I was excited for my son to have that new experience of working with a different team coach.
Throughout their childhood, as parents we expose our kids to new experiences—skating lessons, preschool, dance, social and other skill development opportunities. These aren’t just to give parents a break; they help our children develop skills and independence. Parenting is about preparing our kids to leave the nest and thrive. It’s not easy for us, but ultimately, it’s a sign of parental success.
This philosophy applies to goaltending as well. From an early age, I made sure my son worked with various coaches. He was exposed to different perspectives and learned about himself as a goaltender. Playing other sports also played a role in shaping his development. All of this built a strong foundation so that when the time came, he was ready to move forward.
As he grew older, our relationship evolved. I didn’t have all the answers, and others taught him things I couldn’t. But we worked together, discussing ideas and learning from each other. If I had tried to control too much—if he had only worked with coaches who shared my approach or worse, had I insisted on being his only coach—he would have missed out on those invaluable learning opportunities. No matter how well he might have played, he wouldn’t have been prepared to stand on his own.
Now, he’s out of the nest. He works well with his team’s goalie coach. He thrives when training independently. We still talk about goaltending, but now he leads those conversations. I believe that makes him a stronger goaltender—and a stronger person. But all of it was built on the foundation of the years we spent together on the ice and the relationship we nurtured along the way.
For those navigating the balance of being both a coach and a parent, I hope this offers some perspective. And for those hesitant to coach their young child, I encourage you to give it a try. The unfortunate reality is that without you, your child might not get the support they need. But more importantly, coaching provides a unique opportunity to build a bond with your son or daughter—one that will last a lifetime.
As parents, we’re always looking for ways to help our kids succeed—especially in a position as demanding as goaltending. That’s why NHL Sense Arena is such a game-changer. It’s not just another training tool; it’s real goalie development in a virtual environment. Your young goalie can sharpen their tracking, decision-making, and puck-reading skills—all without the wear and tear of extra ice time, and without the added cost of expensive extra on-ice sessions.
This segment is from InGoal Radio Episode 293 with Connor LaCouvee
Episode Transcript
Parent segment brought to us by the Stop It Goaltending U, the app.
Yeah. Stop It Goaltending U, the app. We've talked about it the last couple of weeks. The fact that it is more than just all the highlights, the videos, the daily affirmations, you can do one minute videos every day. Every week, there's new ones.
Pick a topic. They walk through it one minute at a time. Five minute breakdowns. They've got drills. They've got tips.
They've got breakdowns of NHL goalies. They've got all these video, new ones every week to keep you not just I I'd say entertained too. Some of them are really educational, but also entertaining. They got some pep music videos, little power pep drills, but also they have the services that Stop It offers in terms of helping you moving into junior hockey. They've got private consulting.
All of those things are available through the app. You can schedule those appointments depending on the level you buy into. And regardless of whether you just buy a base subscription to Stop It Goaltending U the app or a premium subscription, it all comes with InGoal Magazine built in. Well, not built into the app, but built into your price. You get a subscription to us and all of our content at the same time.
So best of both worlds. Stop It Goaltending U, the app. Check it out, and InGoal Magazine premium included. Hutch.
Daren, normally, you ask the questions. Today, I'm gonna ask a couple of questions. I want you guys to give me a little feedback. I saw a question online, and I immediately copied it down because I thought, oh, this is a juicy one. I'm gonna go off here and get really grumpy.
And then as I was preparing, I read a little bit more carefully and my reaction isn't quite so strong anymore. But it's still an interesting topic to discuss. So I'm gonna throw this question out there, guys, and I need your I need your responses. Here is a parent who has said, my child's season is over and won't be skating with their team again until April. They would like to do on ice specific goalie training with their regular coach two or three times a week with occasional shot taking with different hockey coaches and their students.
Is there such a thing as too much goalie training? There's an edit to this I'm gonna add in a second, but let's just get your answers. Woody Woody Woody.
There is. My first
answer would be to ask more In this case.
My first answer would actually be to ask more questions.
Okay.
Once they're back with their team on April, is that for the rest of the summer? Is there an opportunity to do like, that's not that's not a like, that's a we're talking about a month, basically. Right? It's not like you're signing up for another sport. Yep.
I'd actually defer a little bit to this interview we're about to hear with Connor LaCouvee, who is from your neck of the woods, originally from Vancouver Island. Yep. Played signed with NHL teams, played in the American Hockey League, is now over in Europe. And he gets into in his discussion some of the differences that he sees with European goaltenders and how they treat their off season. And some of it is, and he talks about it, playing other sports.
So if there's opportunities there, I mean, a month isn't enough to sign up for a team and play a full season, but there are other things you can do. Tennis is one of the ones he gets into. And he really stresses the importance of doing other things that will still also help you become a better goaltender. I would ask the parent how busy and how many reps that kid has had throughout the season because there is a wear and tear element to this in terms of the physical toll it takes on the body, playing too much through. And if if all those like, so there's more questions to ask, but my temptation and and the age of the goaltender matters here as well in the skill level.
But there's a temptation, I gotta be honest, for me to say, find some other things to do for that month. Maybe back off a little bit. It did sound like a lot to me coming at the end of a season, especially if once they're back with their team in April, it's for the entire summer.
Mhmm. I'll answer that part in a second. Daren, what do you think?
I don't think that you need to be all in all the time. Mhmm. Even if you've got a little bit of space and the the the window is there, I just I take advantage of of the the time away and to to freshen things up slightly. Even if it's just a month, I think a little bit of a window's good.
Yeah. My my reaction was probably even stronger than that, and I was gonna get all grumpy in it probably because I read this the first time when I was a little bit tired. But I'll come back now with the edit for you guys to be very fair to this parent. The edit was they're taking June and July off.
Okay. That's I still have a bit of a
problem with this plan.
Yeah. I still have a bit of a problem with the plan but but what do you think?
That's one
these things for me.
Yeah. So you're good with it? Yeah.
Unless you're seeing signs of repetitive use injury or wear and tear. Like you can still do stuff in that month in terms of physically training and stuff like that without necessarily being on the ice if you're seeing any of those signs. But, yeah, I mean, completely taking the summer off. Again, hopefully doing some other things athletically in those two months, organized or not, does change my answer a little bit. But but, you know, I again, I'd still be a little wary depending on the did you give us an age?
I apologize for that if you did.
No, I didn't. It's it's it's either 12 or 13.
Like, if we're talking like a 10 yeah. Was gonna say, like, we're talking like a 10 or 11 year old. Yeah. It's a lot. It's too much.
Yeah. It sounds like a pretty sounds like a pretty high performance kid too. So there's just a couple things I'd pick out. Yeah. When I when I then came back and saw June and July, I was a little bit better with it.
I was kind of alarmed when I first read it. But here's the piece I would like to just throw in here for you guys. I love that Woody brought up the wear and tear. Even if you think your kid feels fine, you don't like, wear and tear takes years and you don't really know and they're still developing. So be careful.
And here's and I think that comes to the piece that actually bothers me about this a little bit. I'm okay with the specific goalie coach work a couple, maybe three times a week. It's the jumping in with other coaches and just wanting to go out and be a target. If there's a social aspect to that, then maybe that's important. But going out there and just being a drill goalie with a hockey coach who needs somebody to stand in the net can actually be quite detrimental, not just from the wear and tear aspect, which is at sometimes extreme because they're just waves of drills coming at kids, but they're actually imparting some negative habits as well because these are not situations that your child faces in the game.
And the most important thing for them is to learn how to read the game. And in this case, they're learning how to read a completely different book. So I'm not as excited about going out there and just being a drill goalie unless there's something very specific about that opportunity that is helping them. And in terms of the rest of the summer, absolutely get out there and and get involved in in something else. I would just say focus on quality more than quantity.
I maybe the two to three sessions isn't so bad, but I'm not sure about the rest of it. Having some variety in your life. If I was throwing in something different at this time of year, like if that other coach is just running small area games, little scrimmage, go out and have some fun, then go out and have some fun. What does your goalie want? And you don't always have to do what they want.
They might be begging you to do it, but as one coach said to me once, parents, if you ask your kid if they want another ice cream, they're going to say yes. It doesn't mean it's a good idea. It's okay to say no to some of these things as well. Keep them excited. Keep them wanting to be back on the ice, and that's okay.
There's nothing wrong with taking time off. I do congratulate this parent for taking June and July off because a lot of parents don't do that in that fear of having to keep up with everybody else. And, and then I guess the other question I would just ask is what off ice work are you doing? Another thing that Connor brings up in the interview today, are you doing some good specific off ice work that is gonna help that body be stronger and more resilient and be able to handle the sport a little bit better. But, yeah, fun fun to riff on that one a little bit, guys.
I love it. I love that. And and I and, like, I know this wasn't planned, but I do think that my advice to that parent would be to really listen to a lot of the things that Connor's talking about in our feature interview that's coming up presented by Sense Arena because we kinda got into this a little bit. Like, he's transitioning and starting to do some more coaching, when he comes back from playing in Europe in in the summers and some of the lessons that he learned over the years. You know, you maybe could become a better goaltender without going on the ice.
Depend not that I'm saying 12 year olds should study video, but talking about the way we look at our game, talking about even watching more hockey and recognizing patterns. Like, you're right in that window at 12 where we are seeing a lot of the goalies that just go and work with goalie coaches and do station to station work where everything is contained and don't necessarily build a lot of the anticipation. So just because you're not on the ice doesn't mean you can't be getting better, and you don't necessarily and again, Connor gets into this, need to be at the pro level to sort of start to look at the game and try and connect those patterns in different ways. As much as we don't wanna be the parents in the middle of a school year that say stay up late and watch hockey, this is sort of me saying find a way to watch more hockey a little bit because I think that is a big part of this. And so maybe that's part of the equation too.
There's so many things that Connor gets into that I think just perfectly suit this question. Maybe not directly, but might have you think about what that month looks like differently than if you didn't listen to this interview.
I think kids should should have to watch two periods of NHL or some type of high level hockey a week. Two periods. May maybe not have to stay up late or whatever, but you you just gain so much from a hockey sense aspect that that goes beyond making a safe selection or technique. Just learning the game is so important.
See, I would suggest those two periods be Vegas Golden Knights broadcast, just because Daren is on them, but because they like to use the replay from behind the net. I think if we could have a channel, like, it used to be if you had the NHL app, you could pit pick which camera view you watched the game from that doesn't or at least replays that doesn't exist anymore. If they would launch one where you could just watch every game from behind the net, sort of the goalies views from from behind the glass, I
think director, Joel Myers. He loves that. Especially on a on a power play.
Right.
He will it's called a Fletcher cam. It sits right on top of the glass. He will just sit on that camera for the entire time the puck's in the zone and I love it.
In Formula one, you can subscribe to whatever yeah. Formula one now you can subscribe to whatever drivers camera you want to watch this thing. The NHL is falling behind when they were already in a good place with this, so it'd be great to have it. It's funny that you said that, Woody. I absolutely agree with you because I was about to say you could watch hockey on TV or you could go to a local junior rink and stand behind the net.
I always tried to get in with Maddie, to be sure that we were there for the warm up, and we would stand behind the net and just track pucks. I would say, don't feel like this this barrage of pucks coming at you. Just focus on one guy, focus on one puck, track it in. It slows the game down for you, and then enjoy watching the game from there and see what it looks like. Feel the speed.
Watch the plays develop. You feel speed and you see things differently in a live game than you do on TV. Absolutely.
That's great advice.
Yeah. So and junior hockey is a great way to do it. It's everywhere. It's affordable and and it's a good chance to to learn.
I love that, Hutch. I love Darren, do you ever do this? And actually, this probably doesn't apply to Daren because he actually gets to be in the net facing the shots. But I find myself being in NHL rinks all the time. Quite often, I'll just go stand behind the net, behind the goalie, and watch the shots he's facing and try and see how, you know, just how visually it I've got a glass in front of me, I'm not worried about reacting or getting hit.
I'm not standing there imitating the goalie like the kids do sometimes and they end up on YouTube. But just trying to watch and track pucks from NHL releases standing right behind the net is really fun, and you quickly realize just how hard these guys shoot. But it's
And how fast they skate.
Yeah. I love doing that.
We just organically got to a really cool place there.
Yeah. Hutch's Hutch's that was great. I love that. I'd I'd never I'd never thought of that. I think that should almost be a parent segment all on its own, but you need to highlight that one when we post this online.
Comments
Let's talk goaltending!
We welcome your contribution to the comments on this and all articles at InGoal. We ask that you keep it positive and appropriate for all — this is a community of goaltenders and we're here for each other! See our comment policy for more information.
You must be logged in to view and post comments.