Podcast Segment for Goalie Parents – Episode 268

We'll jump over to the tryout conversation with the parent segment presented by Stop It Goaltending U the app.

Before we get into the tips, you know who has lots of great advice and lots of great resources for young goalies? Stop It Goaltending U the app. Do you know it's twenty five years? They are celebrating the anniversary this weekend as we speak right now. Twenty five years of Stop It Goaltending in the Boston area.

Brian Daccord, his son Joey Daccord, who plays for the Seattle Kraken. They've had a big celebration this weekend. And if you think about all the lessons learned over those twenty five years, and not just by Daccord, but by all of the guys that he's had in there and girls in there as staff members, coaches that have played in the NCAA, in the National Hockey League, when you think of our Andrew Raycroft, Like, the amount of information that is shared and available through Stop It Goaltending U is kinda mind blowing. And they've taken it and put it in an app. That's what Stop It Goaltending U, the app, is all about.

It is loaded whether you just wanna use their daily primers one minute a day or dig into some of the longer segments. They've got breakdowns on pro style. They've got drills that they share. There was a great one a couple weeks ago, with Andrew Raycroft, the bump drill that I really enjoyed. Pretty much every level, whether you wanna dig in for an hour or dig in for a couple minutes a day, they've got it there.

It's that wealth of knowledge that comes from twenty five years in the business at Stop It Goaltending U. And as we've said before, double bonus, you get the best of both worlds. If you subscribe to Stop It Goaltending U, the app, you get a free subscription to InGoal Magazine and ingoalmag.com, InGoal Premium, where we add even more to your plate with weekly instruction and tips and drills from NHL and PWHL goaltenders, including a couple fresh new ones this week. Devon Levi with the spin drill and Kristen Campbell, PWHL goalie of the year with some great puck handling drills.

Some incredible images on social media regarding the celebration of Stop It Goaltending U, what they've been able to do over the last twenty five years. Congratulations to Brian and company. And just wanna mention, I was cleaning up the office, my yearly cleanup reorganization the other day, and I found the being a goalie parent book by Brian Daccord, which is really cool, which is a real resource for that. You've got it to how to be a goalie parent. There we are.

Thank you, Hutch, for bringing that up. That just is standing by, like, within arm's reach of you every every recording?

I guess so. I just happen to be where I record. I've got my bookshelf directly to my right and, there's a section that's mostly hockey books and it just happened to be sitting there and I was thinking of the exact same thing as you were talking about it, Daren. So my eyes were already scanning for it.

Yours has a different cover than mine. Oh, does it? Yeah. That's kinda cool. I mean I've got Joey in a night in

every night. Ottawa senator's uniform.

Yeah. Mine has a has a has a different cover on it. The parent segment brought to you by Stop It Goaltending U the app, focusing on thoughts for tryouts, Hutch. Where are we on the preparation for the child, the preparation for the child by the parent, and then preparation for the parent?

I'll have a little bit of everything. Mostly this is for the parents, but, as with everything we do, it ends up impacting our children. My congratulations to Brian and the crew over at Stop It as well on their anniversary. I am sure that Brian has given a ton of advice on tryouts for parents and he's probably, calmed a lot of people after things have been been tough. And I just thought I would share a few of my thoughts and maybe you guys can jump in as well because as always, I'm only one parent.

I've, I've had my experiences. I've obviously spoken to a ton of parents myself who've gone through this, but, these are just my thoughts. So I at some point will publish a tryout tip article over at InGoal aside from just this. So if you've got thoughts, tips, let me know. Parents at ingoalmag.com.

And, and we'll add add your thoughts to what we're doing as well. But from me guys this week, first off, I just want to say, good luck. I hope it works out well for everybody. It's it's not tryout season for everybody. Some organizations do it in the spring.

I find that, I understand why they do, but I find it tough because kids change so much and inside of four or five, six months. But for those who are heading into tryout season, I I hope it goes well. But whatever happens, I hope that everybody has a fantastic year and, your son or your daughter, wherever they play, a great year playing hockey. The thing is, even if it doesn't go in go the way that you want, I just hope that you jump in with both feet and have a good year. I'm gonna tell you a story not about me the goalie parent, but me the goalie.

I was cut guys from two teams in two days and I had already played for both those teams. The main team I played for the year before cut me and, one that I'd This been called up to

this point?

Well, with grade 10. Grade 10. So so, pretty young. And, the team I'd been called up to, for half a season the year before also cut me. And admittedly, I was punching above my weight class with that team.

But, I certainly assumed that I'd be at least back on my previous team having been called up to the top team in the organization. And it was a was a it was a gut punch for me and it was a bit like we see in junior hockey now and even other levels. Even if you're the better goaltender and and I'm pretty sure I was for at least one of those teams based on a whole lot of factors, they might not keep you. And it did feel horrible at the time. But there was little chance I was ever going to make that top team again.

And they had kids that were younger than me that they wanted to, keep playing and move them up one day. So was it unfair? Well, I guess it depends on your perspective. But there wasn't anything that I could do to change it. So I jumped in with both feet to the team that they assigned me to.

And for the next three years I played on that team and I learned to love the game of hockey again for all the right reasons. It was transformative in fact, guys. And I'm still in the game today at some level. So something went right in that, in that couple of days. And they were at the time the worst two days of my life.

But, but they've changed who I am and led me on the path that I am today. So, whatever happens, jump in with both feet. So a few tips heading into tryouts. Somewhere along the line, and this one is before tryouts, and this might be weeks, it might be months ago, I I would just encourage all parents and and this does fall out of Julia Allain's interview, which by the way guys is pretty much a parent segment on its own. There's so much great stuff in there.

But somewhere along the line, let your kids know that you love them for who they are and not the sport that they play. In fact, true story, I did this last night. It's still a few weeks before my son heads to camp and I do the same thing throughout the year. But basically, I just said, I hope you know that your mom and I are proud of you and we love you for who you are, not for hockey. We love you because you throw yourself in with both feet and you work really hard.

And if you change your mind and took up tennis or music or computer programming or whatever it might be, we just love who you are and that you work so hard at it. So, I just think that's really important because we want our kids to understand why we value them and sometimes we probably just assume. So I think things need to be said. Now with the tryouts themselves, keep things relaxed at home. The work has already been done.

Just let the kids go out there and have fun and perform their best. I've said it before, but I'll say it again. Us parents getting all excited, and hyped up, hey, it's a big day. Can't wait for the tryouts. Aren't you excited?

Better get to bed extra early tonight. It's totally understandable that parents do that, but it's not going to help your kids perform. And if anything, it's just gonna add to the potential anxiety around it all. So just relax. Treat it like another ice time.

At the tryouts or on the day of the tryouts, remember that your kids are gonna feed off your energy. So stay calm and keep smiling. You need to sort of be like that proverbial duck on the water who looks calm on the surface, but they're paddling like hell to stay afloat underneath. Your kids need to see that calm above the surface because that'll help them stay calm. So don't go getting all upset if your kid isn't getting to the car fast enough or packing the bag when you want them to or whatever.

Today is not the day to be adding to their stress and teaching them lessons on time and organization. Just help them stay calm. On a similar note, tryout day isn't the day to start checking your gear. Now is the time to call cam. Don't be checking if sticks are taped and toe ties work and skates are sharp.

Maybe normally I'd like the kids to look after all that stuff. We want to teach them that independence. But you know what? If mom and dad want to go have a check, talk to them a couple of weeks in advance, that's more the time to be working on that stuff. Again, we want to keep everything calm around the day.

At the tryouts themselves in the stands, I can't speak to the atmosphere where everybody else is, but it was pretty quiet in most of the tryouts I've ever been to. And yet my wife and I still found time to cheer for good saves at both ends of the rink. We believe in karma and we, of course, wanna see all kids having fun. Please hope for your child's success out there, but don't hope for another kid's failure. Don't be cheering that a kid has let a goal in and maybe that's gonna help your kid's chances.

Again, karma. But you want your kid to be on the right team and you want them to be there because they earned it, not because somebody else fumbled the ball. While you're at the tryout, don't go counting shots and goals, please. Seriously, it will drive you nuts in the end and evaluators are not doing it either. If you've ever listened to Woody on one thing, listen to all his amazing work on analytics and the fact that not all shots are created equal.

I have heard so many parents say, but my kid let in only one goal and that kid made the team and he let in five. It's sorry. It doesn't make sense and you're just going to drive yourself nuts. As Bill Ranford suggested in the Q and A that we published over at InGoal, if there's nasty gossipy chat going on in their stands and it happens at tryouts, maybe just go find a place to stand on your own. Today is not the day to get involved.

And then at the end of the day, I hope you get everything you dream for folks. But if you don't, please accept the result gracefully. If if you feel differently, please let me know parents at ingoalmag.com. But if but I have yet to meet a parent who protested a tryout result through the proper channels and got the result that they hoped for. If by some magic they did get the results changed, it often ends up with a tough season for their kid being placed on a team where people are looking sideways at them knowing what's happened.

I do though know of some excellent young goaltenders guys who have not made teams, have missed opportunities because the organization did not want to deal with their families. I'm not saying it's right. I don't think it is right. I feel so badly for these kids, but it is reality. So don't set your child up for that, please.

It's a stressful, tough time of year, but the reality is it's gonna help your kids grow stronger as people, whatever the result is. Those are a few of my thoughts. Let me know what your best tips are for parents at tryout time. And whether it is tryout season for your kids this week, next week, or not, go out and have a fantastic year playing the game we all love, guys.

I have no issue with an organization making a decision based on, parents and being too involved.

Well, I do for the child.

You're a team.

I do for the child.

Yeah. For the for the child, but you're a team, so it's it's a wake up call for everybody.

Yeah. It's Can I

ask one? Mhmm. Is it the norm to watch in hockey? I've been an evaluator to few and I can't remember, but, like, on my side, volleyball, parents don't watch. Love it. And that like, we're at university right now dealing with university stuff, and so I would expect that to be the norm by you hit that age anyways.

There's a certain level in of independence. She's literally staying in the dorms for four days at a time. But even coming up through the ranks, like, thirteen, 14 U, 17 U, you you drop them off and you don't go in the gym. Parents aren't watching tryouts, and I've always sort of I mean, it's hard not to watch. Mhmm.

But boy, is it, take a lot of the stress because as my wife has told me, I'm not a great watcher.

Well, I would say this, in my experience, it is the norm. All the way up to junior hockey parents are there watching. But we did have those difficult, but in this sense, magical years of COVID where we weren't allowed in the rink for tryouts. And man, that was nice. Because you didn't feel that sort of guilt or stress if you didn't go into the rink because you simply couldn't.

So off we went and we drop our son off at the rink and we went off and did some stairs and went on some hikes and all that sort of stuff and it was kind of freeing. You just had to leave them be. In many ways it was probably the best thing. And I'm also a dance parent and, in dance you certainly never took them in for trying out for anything. We didn't get to watch any of that.

So, there are different experiences. Maybe your organizations are different, but I have not met anybody who didn't get to watch their kids try out at hockey.

I wonder if it'd be better if you didn't. Like, I'm wondering even, like, even if the kid like, especially at different ages, if they feel pressure from the parents, like, hey. You know, as much as we say, just go do your best and have a good time.

I I think it

would Letting them do that might be a little freeing.

I can totally I totally think it is, freeing. But I can also tell you as a teacher that, you get a lot of phone calls from parents telling you how things are going inside your classroom and they aren't there watching. But they do have things to complain about because they think they know what's happening. So I don't know that there's a perfect world. Parents love their kids.

Parents want the best for their kids. So parents get involved. It's just kind of a reality.

Okay. So I got another one here for you. Mhmm.

And obviously, I don't have a kid that plays hockey.

But your Uncle, Woody, you And kinda

well, I've never been to tryouts for for for for nephews. We'll come

to camp this year, Woody.

But I have been a part of evaluation processes. Not anymore because I found them to be some of the most crooked crap I've ever seen, to be perfectly honest. I have watched kids that clearly had talent, but it was unrefined, be the first cuts never to see a goalie coach again when there was clearly so much more talent than the kid that looked like he'd been to goalie school all summer, but was never gonna stop a thing once the game started for real. I have also watched and so I don't know what you make of that, frankly, other than there's some flawed systems out there.

Mhmm.

I have also, however, watched young goalies that, for lack of a better term, look like an unmade bed. And that can be equipment, and I don't wanna advocate for you gotta go buy your kid the latest and greatest equipment because this position's expensive enough. But how you wear it being put together with, as you said, Hutch, like fresh tape on the sticks. I have watched coaches that don't know anything about goaltending immediately make reactions and judgments of a goaltender. Made me sick when I saw it happen based on how what kid that Mhmm.

What what equipment that kid was wearing, bunch of mismatch, but also that it just didn't look like he was wearing it properly. And so this is a really tough one for me because, again, I don't think it should be this way. I don't want parents going out and buying the latest and matching equipment. I really don't want that. But how they wear it, how they present themselves, and that could just be, as you said, Hutch, making sure there's fresh tape on the stick, making sure that the toe ties, making sure you're ready and out there early.

Again, it shouldn't matter, but I've seen it matter. And, so maybe people can take something from that beyond go buy equipment. Just make sure that, you know, you can put fresh laces in a in a pair of on your toe ties. You can, you know, make sure that things sort of

Tape your stick before the tryout.

Buckles are Have it The buckles are done up and and and your pants aren't hanging down to your knees and things like that. And and and it can make a difference. I hate to say it, but it can.

It can. Well, two two things separate there, to respond to, but corrupt or flawed or however you want to refer to it systems for tryouts. It is very, very difficult evaluating. I've I've been a part of it as well. And even if you feel like you've got the best system, it's, it's flawed as at best.

I like to believe that everybody has everybody's best interest at heart but I know that there's mistakes made. The reality is that that is the reality and there's nothing you can do about it. Woody, you don't You chose not to be involved again and you have every right to do that. As a parent though, there's literally nothing you can do about it. So you have to accept the results as they are.

If you feel that's the way the organization works, then maybe it's not the place that, your child should be playing and you need to look for an organization that better fits who you are and looks after your kid better. It sucks. I know that kind of stuff happens. Absolutely. People are making Even though Look, tryouts are not who was the best goalie on those three days.

That's our team. The simple reality is coaches have had kids with them in the past, they sort of know who they are when the game time comes and they think they're making the best judgments. It's just what happens. So yeah, I feel bad for everybody but it's reality. And as to the gear, you're a 100% right.

I I do know that coaches make judgments based on what they see. And I do feel for families that that can't have their kids all outfitted in in the top of the line best everything. I don't think most coaches can really tell Johnny's in the top of the line versus Johnny's in the iconic X because they needed to save a little bit of money based on the, you know, the the gear available to them. But as as you say, what can you do to to make them look as presentable as possible? It's unfortunately kind of a reality of life, isn't it?

I mean, you go to a job interview as you get older and, some people can have that thousand dollar suit and some people can't and it sucks. But what can you do to help them, to the best of your ability and what can we do to help you? Look, there's there's places you can get used gear. If you need some help figuring out how to wear it, there's older goaltenders that you can talk to. Heck, you can email us here and we will do our best to help you through it.

It's it's really tough. It is. And I know But I I know what happens, Woody. So what can we do to help our kids be, and put their best foot forward on on the day of? And what can we do to educate coaches so that they make the right choices?

I mean, I think that's a separate piece of this that maybe we can get involved in. Woody, what can we do to educate Well, that's that

is another piece and that's a whole other story. And and and when we get to that one, maybe we'll save that one for the next one because then I'll share the story of how the non goalie coach didn't like the drills that I put together and how he didn't see how they had anything relevant to anything I did this in front of a room full of lots of people, and I was forced to ask him after he dressed me down for the drills that I set up, all of which designed to pick out and identify very specific skills at a very specific scale for a very specific age group. Nice. And when he was done telling me how unqualified I was for it all, I asked him if he'd heard of the local NHL goalie coach, and of course he had. And then I asked him if he would be surprised to know that each and every drill was set up by that goalie coach specifically for this age group and these skills, including the scoring system that we used.

Love

it. And that was about the last time I worked with that organization.

Yes. I yeah. You you do a good job of putting yourself in that position occasionally.

I I waited I waited until he was done, and then I shared where it all came from. I didn't put my foot in my mouth. So, yeah, there's there's I've got there's a little bit of bitterness there. I had some bad experiences. I watch kids just get.

Well And and I get it. You're right. It's not a perfect system. But it's But there's

but I mean there's

two you can't do anything about it.

Well, and that's the thing. And unfortunately, Woody, when you flexed on that guy there, as you said, it was the last time you worked with that organization. And you may have been right. And for you, it had zero consequences because that wasn't the career path you were looking for to become a minor hockey goalie evaluator.

Oh, I was doing it as a favor to the President of

the organization. But now as a parent, you could be a 100% right and flex on the organization and your kid will never play there again. So so there's sort of two lessons there. But what can we do to help parents? I think since those days, that's Hockey Canada has brought in their coaching certification for goalie coaches and they've tried to make that widely available, not just to goalie coaches.

They want all coaches to be certified as, understanding the position and being able to to teach at least the basics. And as you've mentioned before, USA Hockey has something similar and I'm sure all our listeners in other countries will tell us that there's a lot of great programs around. So I think progress has been made since those days, but I know there are still lots of flaws. So we will do our best to share what we know. And, and I would say, if if I can Woody is the master of the shameless plug, but maybe it's my turn.

We piloted a program of bringing InGoal to associations last year with the Oakville Minor Hockey Association and, they're coming back on board again this year. Thank you very much. And we are going to expand that program to other associations. And maybe that's a way that we can help spread some of the knowledge and experience from great people like Woody to coaches out there. Because part of what we did with Oakville, they wanted their goaltenders to have access to InGoal.

We made sure all their coaches or at least one coach per team had access to InGoal as well because we really believe in coach education and the impact it can have on kids.